Wrapping up 2020 - gladly!

I'll start with Christmas and the activities before it.  My focus in the week or two before Christmas was doing the "Secret Santa" project that Mat made possible on my birthday. He had saved $100 a month from our already tight budget (my birthday is in August), and gave me a birthday card with 8 crisp hundred dollar bills in it - with the caveat that I use it to bless people around Christmas.  I am very inspired by those Secret Santa videos where Santas go out anonymously and hand out hundred dollar bills to unsuspecting, random people.  I am also very aware of the needs at the food bank this year, the need has gone up 300% due to Covid. I found out what the Bountiful Food Bank was in desperate need of, then went shopping and bought a whole bunch of supplies and specific food items for them.  Then I went out with my sister and did the secret santa thing at a couple of locations.  That was SUPER COOL! The only picture I got related to it was my sister giving money to a woman sitting at a bus stop in a snow storm. I hope she's OK I posted her picture, can't really see her or the lady, but that was awesome!  One lady I gave $ to said that she was OK, she didn't need it. I told her it was for her, but if she wanted to pay it forward, that was totally great.  I had 2 bills left after me and my sister went, so I took Mat with me to give those out.  He was nervous about what to say and how to do it, which is funny coming from a teacher who has worked with thousands of kids he didn't know at first!  I think we're starting a new tradition! 

Christmas at our house was great!  Isaac came and we had a great lunch, then opened presents.  We have a tradition of the kids buying presents for each other from Dollar Tree.  It's always hilarious to see what they pick out for each other!  We don't go crazy, but everyone was happy.  Maddie bought pajamas at Petco for all the kids and Pyper, they were all going to match, but we held off too long and did the best we could with what they had. Pyper did NOT dig her pj's!  She tolerated it long enough for the picture.

Carley and Cricket

It's been really nice spending time with Jeanne (Mats sister) and fam, and his Dad.  He was very happy to see us and it's been great to spend time with him and go on walks with him.  Yesterday, the kids went with them to a "U-Pick" citrus farm, so we're bringing home 2 big bags of oranges, a few lemons and some grapefruit - picked yesterday!  While they did that, Mat and I drove to Sierra Vista to visit my cousin who was diagnosed with inflammatory breast cancer, after already having MS and a seizure disorder.  She has many worries and stresses and I was glad to be able to talk to her for a couple of hours.  We talked about ways she can "fill her bucket", what she can do to make sure she's taking care of her emotional / spiritual needs. One thing she loves to do is visit her friends horses, so I told her to do that - everyday if she needs to!  Unfortunately, we forgot to get a picture together, but she did send me pictures of her with her favorite horse she saw later in the day.  I was super happy to see that!

Having 2020 in the rear view mirror makes me happy!  I know we're not done with COVID yet, but there's a light at the end of the tunnel.  It's really been one of the toughest times in my life, so much change, uncertainty, "fake news" and isolation.  In some ways it's been a real eye opener, made me see where progress needs to be made, how there's a real need for spiritual and physical preparation because the future is so uncertain.  If at least 80% of my friends could please get the vaccine, I'd be forever grateful!

2020 - the year that lasted 10

When I think back to the beginning of this year, it seems like it was so long ago.  It seems impossible that it was a short 10 months ago when the world turned upside down, all at once!  I've struggled with isolation, online school, the cancellation of everything I felt I needed to stay sane, church, mingling, seeing friends who live "way up" on the other side of the ward, seeing friends in general, depression and anxiety, fear, paranoia, a TP shortage, election drama - throw in an earthquake and hurricane force winds for good measure.  Did I remember everything?  Geez.  I've been a bit obsessive this year about buying TP and hand sanitizer. When I found gallon sized hand sanitizer at Costco for 10 bucks, I decided I'm probably good for now!

I don't know who took this picture, but its a beauty!

In September I passed my 3 year anniversary of stage 4 diagnosis. Three years?!?  How is it possible.  It's been so hard, there have been many sleepless nights and buckets of tears shed.  On a night recently as I pity partied, I had a thought come into my mind that was, "Focus on living, Kim ... not dying." I was grateful to hear those words in that moment when I needed remember that having FAITH in my God, will drive away the fear of the unknown.  I have faith in my doctors and the teams of people at Huntsman that work everyday to do the very best they know to help us get through all aspects of the cancer experience. 

Good things have come out of cancer too.  Perspectives and priorities change, people come into your life that you desperately needed, my focus has changed to the people I love - there are a lot of you out there!  I'm so grateful for my people, my kids and Mat, and countless friends out there who have helped me in so many ways. 

As Christmas approaches, I want to spend more time playing Christmas songs really loud while I belt out the lyrics.  I want to get a few things organized, a few projects finished, a few people called.  We look forward with hope for the future.  We are blessed beyond measure.  Thank you for keeping tabs on us!  We love you!