Have you seen that Studio C skit "uh nuh, I DON'T DO MORNINGS!" That's how I've been feeling this week. My chemo was scheduled for 7:10 this morning. I really don't do mornings because I don't sleep very well. I called Infusion several times this week to see if there were any cancellations so I could come in later. Nope! My friend Cari came with me today. She graciously rearranged her schedule to accommodate the early morning, and I'm so glad she did.
I've thought so much about what I can control and what I can't. I've pondered the alternative treatments I hear about regularly, and the ones I have learned about on my own. It gets a little overwhelming and I struggle to know what to do. So many websites, so many promises! I get a little anxious having so many things to consider (FEAR).
As I talked to Cari about it this morning, she said (paraphrasing) "God is the only one who knows what will work for you. If there's something you want to consider, after studying it out in your mind, go to Him. He will tell you what to do!" I tend to study things out in my mind and then make my own decision. "I got this, Heavenly Father. I can handle it..." She promised me if I would ask, He will tell me what I should do (FAITH).
After she dropped me off at home, I laid down because the kids weren't home from school yet. Because I was laying still and paying attention, I noticed two new common side effects of these drugs. I can feel tingling in my toes (neuropathy) and my hips are achey (bone pain). Neither one is bad, but it's the cumulative effect of the drugs in my body. Did I make a mistake in going this route? No way. I have NO regrets.
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