It is funny how I can be fine one day, and completely hysterical the next. I just need to get this down so I can try to be OK today! I got a huge binder filled with information from the Breast Care Coordinator at IMC in Murray. I sat down last night and read quite a bit. It explains that when a gene mutates and becomes cancer, it can take many months or years before the tumor gets to the point to where it can be felt by self exam. So then the questions start coming. I've been pretty tuned in to my breasts this year, with the baby, nursing a short time and then working to dry it up (nursing is a miserable experience for me). By the end of July, the supply was down enough that I didn't need to pump anymore. For another month, I could massage and express out the last little bits of milk. So by the end of August, everything was completely normal, back to my usual flatness. If this type of cancer grows slowly (which is what everyone is telling me), why then, in two months time did I go from feeling nothing unusual to feeling an almond? Seems like, based on what I read last night, my bad boy is pretty darn fast. So, now I worry. The surgery is delayed until the 14th, and that's OK because I need the whole team present. But I worry. Please continue to keep me / us in your prayers. Please pray that I can avoid irrational thoughts and that this cancer will be cured.
We are going Christmas shopping today. We talked to the kids a few months ago about using their Christmas money to redo their bedrooms because we still have the 1970 paint we inherited with the house. That is too much to consider right now, so we'll just have a "normal" Christmas and paint in 6 or 7 months. Brooklyn and Isaac have no problem finding things to buy, Maddie can't think of anything she wants to buy. Today will be an adventure!
6 comments:
How about not just praying but having a family/friend fast this weekend, since tomorrow is Fast Sunday? I asked Darrell this morning what he wants to fast for and he suggested we fast for you (and a girl in our ward who has cancer). If he hadn't suggested it, I would have. You will beat this thing, Kim. I'll put your name on the prayer roll again next Monday. You have been in so many prayers!
Kim, I wish I could get this for you. It's only been out about as long as you've been diagnosed. I do believe that we have everything we need in the scriptures and in the Temple, but sometimes reminders are helpful in the way that they are expressed by others, as well as validation and specifics by those are have gone through breast cancer and those involved in healing. http://breastcancerdvd.org/
Hold on to each peaceful moment that comes and allow it to grow. I wish you could send the kids to Alaska for awhile, but that wouldn't be keeping things "normal" for them. I'll talk to you soon. Love you, Annette
Kim, it was good to see you and chat for a few minutes today. Stay strong and positive! You and your cute family are still in our prayers.
Hi Kim. I am Laura Dalton (Gardner)- Carol and Norm's granddaughter. Thanks for starting a blog so we can keep up with your cute family and your cancer. You are in our prayers!
Thank you for your prayers Laura! I am so grateful for so many wonderful people out there praying and thinking of me/us! : )
Kim
Kim, I think it's awesome that they get a "normal" Christmas! Let them have some fun things they want and just be kids for a little while. My mom was in 1st grade when her mom was diagnosed, her surgery (this was back in the 50s and horrible horrible horrible), took place a few weeks before Christmas and she was in the hospital over the holidays. Neighbors and family made sure the kids had a normal Christmas and my mom said she'll never forget how much people did to make things fun. Let them just worry about fun, that will be perfect! Paint can always be done, and it will be great to do it when you can open the windows so let it wait and enjoy this holiday. As always, you are in my thoughts and prayers. Keep on trucking!
Post a Comment